Dear Architect

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Dear Architects I am sick of your shit.
Annie Choi
(An Open Letter)
Once, a long time ago in the days of yore, I had a friend who was
studying architecture to become, presumably, an architect.
This friend introduced me to other friends, who were also studying
architecture. Then these friends had other friends who were
architects - real architects doing real architecture like designing
luxury condos that look a lot like glass dildos. And these real
architects knew other real architects and now the only people I
know are architects. And they all design glass dildos that I will
never work or live in and serve only to obstruct my view of New
Jersey.
Do not get me wrong, architects. I like you as a person. I think you
are nice, smell good most of the time. and I like your glasses. You
have crazy hair, and If you are lucky, most of it is on your head.
But I do not care about architecture. It is true. This is what I do
care about:
• burritos
• hedgehog
• coffee
As you can see, architecture is not on the list. I believe that architecture falls
somewhere between toenail fungus and invasive colonoscopy in the list of things
that Interest me.
Perhaps if you didn't talk about it so much, I would be more interested when you
point to a glass cylinder and say proudly, hey my office designed that. I giggle and
say it looks like a bong. You turn your head in disgust and shame. You think,
obviously she does not understand. What does she know? She is just a writer.
She is no architect. She respects vowels, not glass cocks. And then you say now
I am designing a lifestyle center, and I ask what is that, and you say it is a place
that offers goods and services and retail opportunities and I say you mean like a
mall and you say no. It is a lifestyle center. I say it sounds like a mall. I am from
the Valley, bitch. I know malls.
Architects, I will not lie, you confuse me. You work sixty, eighty hours a week and
yet you are always poor. Why aren't you buying me a drink? Where is your
bounty of riches? Maybe you spent it on merlot. Maybe you spent it on hookers
and blow. I cannot be sure. It is a mystery. I will leave that to the scientists to
figure out.
Architects love to discuss how much sleep they have gotten. One will say how he
was at the studio until five in the morning, only to return again two hours later.
Then another will say, oh that is nothing, I haven't slept in a week. And then
another will say, guess what, I have never slept ever. My dear architects, the
measure of how hard you've worked and how much you've accomplished is not
related to the number of hours you have not slept. Have you heard of Rem
Koolhaas? He is a famous architect. I know this because you tell me he IS a
famous architect. I hear that Rem Koolhaas is always sleeping. He is, I presume,
sleeping right now. And I hear he gets shit done. And I also hear that in a
stunning move, he is making a building that looks not like a glass cock, but like a
concrete vagina. When you sleep more, you get vagina. You can all take a lesson
from Rem Koolhaas.
I
life is hard for me, please understand. Architects are an important part of my
existence. They call me at eleven at night and say they just got off of work, am I
hungry? listen, it is practically midnight. I ate hours ago. So long ago that, in fact, I
am hungry again. So yes, I will go. Then I will go and there will be other architects
talking about AutoCAD shortcuts and something about electric panels and can you
believe that is all I did today, what a drag I look around the table at the poor, tired,
and hungry, and think to myself, I have but only one bullet left in the gun. Who will I
choose?
I have a friend who is a doctor. He gives me drugs. I enjoy them. I have a friend
who is a lawyer. He helped me sue my landlord. My architect friends have given
me nothing. No drugs, no medical advice, and they don't know how to spell
subpoena. One architect friend figured out that my apartment was one hundred
and eighty seven square feet. That was nice. Thanks for that.
I suppose one could ask what someone like me brings to architects like your
selves. I bring cheer. I yell at architects when they start talking about architecture. I
force them to discuss far more interesting topics, like turkey eggs. Why do we eat
chicken eggs, but not turkey eggs? They are bigger. And people really like turkey.
See? I am not afraid to ask the tough questions.
So, dear architects, I will stick around, for only a little while. I hope that one day
some of you will become doctors and lawyers or will figure out my taxes. And we
will laugh at the days when you spent the entire evening talking about some
European you've never met who designed a building you will never see because
you are too busy working on something that will never get built. But even if that
day doesn't arrive, give me a call anyway, I am free.
Yours truly, Annie Choi

That lady must be horny, I guess.

Well i think sa tunay na buhay totoo yan, dito na nga lang sa China kapag binabasa ko mga message nila nawawalan ako ng malay at minsan kahit anong intindi ko diko talaga na gegets, pero minsan kasi translate nila ang chinese in english at minsan di tama ang translation.

i like this girl..she's full of humor..i'd be delighted to see her in person..

nakakatawa nga e...and the fact na mga sinabi nya about us totoo. but still napapalibutan pa rin sya ng architects. natawa akong sobra how she describes us.

"And we will laugh at the days when you spent the entire evening talking about some European you've never met who designed a building you will never see because you are too busy working on something that will never get built. But even if that day doesn't arrive, give me a call anyway, I am free."

ang sweet ng last line nya....

Sana nga nag Doctor na lang ako! hmmmm, sino ba tong Annie Choi? Any other infos regarding her background Sir f41?

isa siyang author ng book sir kurdaps ito yung link nya.

http://www.annietown.com/contact/

interesting yung mga ideas nya. binabasa ko pa yung info about her. since na send lang sa aking yan topic nya in PDF format pa kaya na interest akong basahin. ito basa basa mode muna ako....

hahaha.... so true... may pagka-boring ang mga arki kapag di ka one of them. panu ka naman kasi makaka-relate kung paguusapan nila eh malaking question mark for you.... i have the same complains sa BF ko minsan (the fact na arki sya), but the funniest thing is mahilig sya sa tulog. hahaha...

sino ba tong Annie Choi na to sir??? she's kinda' intresting

Yhna wrote:hahaha.... so true... may pagka-boring ang mga arki kapag di ka one of them. panu ka naman kasi makaka-relate kung paguusapan nila eh malaking question mark for you.... i have the same complains sa BF ko minsan (the fact na arki sya), but the funniest thing is mahilig sya sa tulog. hahaha...

sino ba tong Annie Choi na to sir??? she's kinda' intresting

mam yhna

some info about her, pero di ko ma open yung link ng - www.thestudleypress.com
http://wadias.in/site/arzan/blog/dear-architects-i-am-sick-of-your-shit/

kunti lang nakikita kong link tungkol sa kanya. pero parang ang dami nyang alam about architecture stuff.

nice, she seems like a very creative writer. reminds me of our very own jessica zafra

well for me i think this girl doesn't really appreciate the work of an architect,or he was hurt by an Architect i dunno,haha, she cant compare it to other professions coz' they're totally different folks, somehow she has a point but then i think its just her personal opinion, in fact i would've ask her for a debate how things run in real practice for a current life of every profession. i am looking forward for her second letter to reach my mailbox,hehe

well architects dont talk about work all the time.
-we talk about basketball, badminton(for gay architects(not all)) shoes, women,clothings, cars, motorcycles. travelling etc.
-and hey i know how to spell subpoena. hahaha
-i think his architect ex boyfriend is v lame and boring thats why she's talking trash about us.
- sometimes i dont need writer's like annie choi they just cloud my polluted mind. just what is happening right now.
- sorry guys got carried away
-

f-fortyone wrote:isa siyang author ng book sir kurdaps ito yung link nya.

http://www.annietown.com/contact/

interesting yung mga ideas nya. binabasa ko pa yung info about her. since na send lang sa aking yan topic nya in PDF format pa kaya na interest akong basahin. ito basa basa mode muna ako....

Mukhang type mo si Annie ah...hahahaha

f-fortyone wrote:

Yhna wrote:hahaha.... so true... may pagka-boring ang mga arki kapag di ka one of them. panu ka naman kasi makaka-relate kung paguusapan nila eh malaking question mark for you.... i have the same complains sa BF ko minsan (the fact na arki sya), but the funniest thing is mahilig sya sa tulog. hahaha...

sino ba tong Annie Choi na to sir??? she's kinda' intresting

mam yhna

some info about her, pero di ko ma open yung link ng - www.thestudleypress.com
http://wadias.in/site/arzan/blog/dear-architects-i-am-sick-of-your-shit/

kunti lang nakikita kong link tungkol sa kanya. pero parang ang dami nyang alam about architecture stuff.

oo nga kuya. natawa lang ako kasi at the end of the day. architects parin ang kasama nya....
i love architects though. kasi ORIG sila ASTIG pa.

oo nga, sino si anie choi master, craving for more info bout her, hehehe.. interesting po. thanks for sharing.

Leslie Adona wrote:

f-fortyone wrote:isa siyang author ng book sir kurdaps ito yung link nya.

http://www.annietown.com/contact/

interesting yung mga ideas nya. binabasa ko pa yung info about her. since na send lang sa aking yan topic nya in PDF format pa kaya na interest akong basahin. ito basa basa mode muna ako....

Mukhang type mo si Annie ah...hahahaha

HAHAHA....ang sweet lang kasi after all ng ayaw nya sa profession ng architect pero architect pa rin na yun yung kasama nya.....saka sawa na sya sa architect..kita naman di ba?...wahehe...

Yhna wrote:

f-fortyone wrote:

Yhna wrote:hahaha.... so true... may pagka-boring ang mga arki kapag di ka one of them. panu ka naman kasi makaka-relate kung paguusapan nila eh malaking question mark for you.... i have the same complains sa BF ko minsan (the fact na arki sya), but the funniest thing is mahilig sya sa tulog. hahaha...

sino ba tong Annie Choi na to sir??? she's kinda' intresting

mam yhna

some info about her, pero di ko ma open yung link ng - www.thestudleypress.com
http://wadias.in/site/arzan/blog/dear-architects-i-am-sick-of-your-shit/

kunti lang nakikita kong link tungkol sa kanya. pero parang ang dami nyang alam about architecture stuff.

oo nga kuya. natawa lang ako kasi at the end of the day. architects parin ang kasama nya....
i love architects though. kasi ORIG sila ASTIG pa.

totoo yan....sis!!! architect pa rin!!!....